Friday, January 29, 2010

Hoping Life might get a little better in Haiti...

Not to suggest anything we've done to help Haiti is supernatural, but last night comedians, visual artists, the Comix staff, and a giving audience teamed up to raise more than $10,ooo for &

Todd Barry and Anthony Jeselnik gear up for the event! Also on the lineup were Seth Herzog, Jeff Kreisler, Wil Sylvince, Chris Gethard, John Mulaney, Anthony Jeselnik, Wyatt Cenac, The Writers of 'The Onion', Eugene Mirman, Aasif Mandvi, Geneane and Dave Attell!

Our own Kambri Crews reads raffle winners with Seth Herzog

Janeane Garofalo shows that you can support a good cause and still look badass!

Dave Attell Smiling!

The comedians enjoy the show from the green room.

Mike Mitchell with his iconic "I'm with Coco" signed poster! He and all of us were pleasantly surprised that it sold for $1,650!
photo by Mindy Tucker

Kambri Crews and Carol Hartsell with "Coco." Special thanks to Carol for hooking us up with Mike Mitchell!
Photo by Mindy Tucker

A few people came all the way from Vermont, and the woman who put in the winning bid traveled from Albany! Well worth the trip. It was a blow-out!

If you'd like to see someone else's take, how bout you check out The Huffington Post!

Check out more of Mindy Tucker's Photos here!

Photos of comedians courtesy of our very own Kirill Bitchutsky:

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Thursday, January 28, 2010

Life's Tough when snow turns you into a douchebag...

I can't decide which guy I don't like more...


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Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Life's Tough for this Christian...

Own a Piece of Pop Culture History

Here's another fun item that we're offering up for our auctions to benefit Partners in Health as part of our SOLD OUT "I'm with Coco" Haiti Benefit.

Perennial losers to the Harlem Globetrotters, The Washington Generals very kindly offered to hire Conan O'Brien and Andy Richter after hearing they would be out of a job as host and sidekick of The Tonight Show on NBC. Now you can own a piece of history with this Washington Generals' uniform autographed by Andy Richter!

Memorialize the epic Tonight Show battle with this handsome green jersey and shorts set with Andy Richter's name all over it! Buy this item and you'll be helping raise money for Partners in Health as part of comedy nightclub Comix's "I'm with Coco Benefit for Haiti" on January 28th in New York City!

Modeled by Justin

Closeup on the autograph

Outtakes from the photo shoot

Go bid now!

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

This Can Be Yours!

Fun stuff is just flooding in for us to raffle and auction off for our Haiti benefit this Thursday. Here's one of our favorites: a copy of issue #573 of The Amazing Spider-Man, featuring Stephen Colbert, signed by Stephen Colbert and artist Jose Quesada! Go here to bid on it, and all the money will go to Partners in Health!

We Have to Admit, We Would Totally Use This Service

Check out this hilarious video from Paul Scheer on Funny or Die, and then check out Paul Scheer and Rob Huebel at Comix on March 19th and 20th!

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Life's Tough If You Work in the Legal System and Have to Hear These Cases

Enjoy this collection of the four most frivolous lawsuits in history (thanks All Things Mundane!)

In Michigan, a 27 year old man was the victim of a minor car accident. Several years later, the man sued the person who hit him claiming that the accident changed his sexuality. He said that since the accident he was no longer sexually attracted to his wife, moved in with his parents, and started frequenting gay bars.

In 1991, another Michigan man sued Budweiser for false advertising and mental anguish. Citing a commercial in which two women come to life for a couple of Budweiser drinkers, he was angry that he wasn’t experiencing the same fantasy. That case was dismissed.

A woman was watching the local news, where the weather report predicted sunny weather. She went out without a coat and got caught in a downpour. She subsequently caught a flu bug, missed four days of work, and had to buy some NyQuil. She sued for $1000 for that and mental duress.

A woman sued an Egyptian hotel because she claimed the swimming pool at the hotel got her 13-year-old daughter pregnant. She said that there must have been sperm floating in the pool because her daughter “did not meet any boys on the trip”. That daughter went on to win an Oscar for Best Actress.

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Life's Tough when you've found your true calling...

This poor rooster has such a bad day job, and such a great talent...


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For the last few weeks, Carol Hartsell has been live tweeting the open mic that happens each Monday in Ochi's Lounge here at Comix. The mic is called Ochi's Motel and it's one of the best in the city, and because of Carol's hard work, you can get a taste of all the insanity that happens when comics stop being polite and start doing new material. Read on to see Carol's tweets from this past week and don't forget to follow carolhartsell and comixny on Twitter to keep up with the fun!

It's 6:30, do you know where your mic is? #iloveanopenmic

Blaine Perry hosting. Wearing a "39 & Holding" t-shirt. Prizes are The Graduate & Mad Max. #iloveanopenmic

Mike Lawrence: "I've outlived almost everything I care about." #iloveanopenmic

Love Lawrence's Ghostbusters/Stay Puft/9-11 joke. #iloveanopenmic

This lady's therapist is "full of shit." #nobletruths #iloveanopenmic

First female comic on the board w/ PMS & therapist jokes. #youarenothelping #iloveanopenmic

Dan St. Germain: "Blaine Perry: voted least likely to be Martin Luther King." #iloveanopenmic

"The Dennis Farina Foundation" LOL, St. Germain! #iloveanopenmic

We're with you, no we're not, with you, no we're not... The fickle bitch that is a mic. #iloveanopenmic

Uh oh...white guy rage. Not working on MLK day. Disconnect! Disconnect! #iloveanopenmic

I hope @marknormand is really a janitor and that's not just a bit. I used to trust him. #iloveanopenmic

"You can't have a happy ending without conflict." Nice @marknormand #iloveanopenmic

"Stupid's the new,'s not." #nobletruths #iloveanopenmic

Theme of night: shitting on your comedian friends. #iloveanopenmic

Ok guys, come on let's not go down the gaming rabbit hole. #yourxboxjokesarepmsjokes #iloveanopenmic

Farts are funny. #nobletruths #setsavers #iloveanopenmic

Raquel D'Apice is up. Loved her Montreal audition last week. #iloveanopenmic

"You're gonna go to Peekskill and make something of yourself!" #noonehaseversaidthatforreal #iloveanopenmic

Don't speak of King as though he's just some guy in the bathroom! #kingrules! #iloveanopenmic

There's a David Taylor lookalike here. #iloveanopenmic

Nice, new girl from last week back. Improving. Cool. #iloveanopenmic

"Speaking of cumbersome faces..." #iloveanopenmic

Host Blaine Perry: "This next comic shaves his balls!" #iloveanopenmic

Zach Sims believes that when people say "do it, do it" you should never, in fact, do it. #nobletruths #iloveanopenmic

Sean William Scott lookalike tells humorous Mark McGuire joke! #iloveanopenmic

You aren't still saying happy new year "just to fuck with people". You're saying it cause you haven't written a new joke. #iloveanopenmic

And then you did a rape joke. #growballs #iloveanopenmic

Oh and now an age of consent joke. #youhaventearnedthat #deadtome #iloveanopenmic #maybenotalways

Donnelly freaking out about people asking where the bathroom is. Ha! #theresonlyonewaytogo #iloveanopenmic

"I have a girlfriend who's white..." [laughter] "That's not the punchline." #nobletruths #iloveanopenmic

"I tried really hard to avoid a Haiti joke there." #fail #iloveanopenmic #notanymore

Not a bad set, guy, but I'd rethink that "I'll never vote for a female president cause my gf falls asleep easily" bit. #iloveanopenmic

This is Misogyny Hills, next stop, Bitches Aint Shit Park. #meetingsadexpectations #iloveanopenmic #inowhateanopenmic

Holy crap, it's the Lars von Trier comedy hour. #iloveanopenmic #inowhateanopenmic

Someone said shtupped! Back! #iloveanopenmic

"Jim Crow laws don't exist anymore. At Outback Steakhouse there are no rules." #nobletruths #iloveanopenmic

There's no time to fuss with the mic cord in a 4.5 minute set. #iloveanopenmic

I think someone just referred to having sex as "getting a little cookie." #iloveanopenmic

Foul play! No more Bea Arthur has a dick jokes! #haverespectforthedead #iloveanopenmic

Dan Fontaine is diverse because he's been struck by lightening. Ha! #iloveanopenmic

Zod is back! Kneel! #iloveanopenmic

"Fetishes, let's talk about em." Segue of the night. #iloveanopenmic

"I'm making myself and everyone here uncomfortable." #nobletruths #iloveanopenmic

"AT LEAST THE BIT HAS STRUCTURE!" Ha! #nobletruths #iloveanopenmic

"You guys have been...ah, you know...stuff." #nobletruths #iloveanopenmic

Jay Welch! Rock! #iloveanopenmic

Hot Asian Comedian Who I Now Have a Crush On to audience member: "Even your heckle bombed!" #iloveanopenmic

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Top Ten Reasons Why Dating a Comedian is Better Than Dating a Musician (with Comedian Response)

Today, we present to you our own top ten reasons why dating a comedian is better than dating a musician, written by a Comix employee married to a comedian, with responses (in parentheses) by a Comix employee that is a comedian.

If you have any to add, let us know!

10. No equipment lugging, thank heavens (though there is emotional baggage).

9. You don't end up deaf at the end of the night (though you will wish you could “unhear” that bit about pussyfarts).

8. You don’t have to hear long, drawn out stories with weak punchlines just because they sang “Free Bird” (Comedians just tell long, drawn out stories. And then apologize for not having a point.)

7. You don’t have to learn all the words to the songs and sing along with them at his shows.

6. When he tries out new songs/material on you, you’re not awkwardly staring at the ground while he strums a guitar and sings soulfully (instead, you’re talking about something serious like your fear of mortality, and he stares off into the void as if really contemplating what you said, then tries a “how bout these McGriddles” bit on you again.)

5. Even if the show is horrible, he’ll only be up there for like, 10 minutes max (but you’ll have to wait 30 minutes more than you though you would while the host talks to his mom onstage).

4. You don’t have to help him come up with lame rhymes to words like “struggle” and “heart”. (but you will have to think seriously about whether it’s funnier to reference Jersey Shore or Olive Garden in a bit that is borderline racist)

3. You do get to come up with funny observations about movies and etc and so on. (but you will be judged if they’re kind of hack.)

2. Comedians don’t take themselves so damn seriously. (unless they’re John Mayer)

1. Funny is sexy. (is it?! I’ve been going about this all wrong.)
(If comedy were a drug, it’d give old people a four hour erection! What’s the deal with those pills??)

Monday, January 18, 2010

Dude Gets a Pair of Glasses Tattooed on His Face

Life's tough when this doofus is your son.

Dude Gets a Pair of Glasses Tattooed on His Face

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Laugh More with random Youtube searches...

Today we searched "Chicken" and "Footloose" and found this:

Do your own right now, and send it to us!

If you get a really funny one, we'll post it!

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Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Life's Tough in this woman's mind...

She may in fact be a genius...

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Monday, January 11, 2010

Life's Tough when you can't pronounce the hosts from that one show...

Thursday, January 7, 2010

Life's Tough in 2009...

Here are the BEST FAILS of 2009:

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Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Nic Cage as Everyone

This is how we're spending our time here at the Comix offices- looking at Nic Cage as EVERYONE. Here are our favorites:

Nic Cage as Sarah Palin

Nic Cage as Han Solo

Nic Cage as Zac Efron

Nic Cage as Gandalf

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Triumph the Insult Comic Dog at Comix!

Here's a great clip of Triumph the Insult Comic Dog on our stage headlining the cancer benefit Tell Your Friends! We'll Kick Cancer's Butt!

Life's Tough for the Cowbell Girl at the Fiesta Bowl

She really, really, really, really hates playing the cowbell.

Come to Comix princess. We'll turn that frown upside down!

Monday, January 4, 2010

Life's Tough When You're a Snowman...

Christmas and the New Year have passed...

Now people are trying to get rid of snow any way they can:

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